And in the blink of an eye–
or perhaps several–
rather in the pregnant pause during which long day becomes longer night;
rather through the oceans of tears, the choruses of broken sobs;
rather between a long series of desolate, restless naps,
and the collective hours on hours of drowning in half-consciousness–
four years have gone by.
In the exchange of a half-hearted smile,
the offer of a hollow laugh,
a joke only laughed at in politeness,
a lifetime slipped through my fingers.
Like sand, like dirt, like water,
time slips away, compresses between my palms, sustains my existence
scratches the skin, stains the fingernails, drowns me daily.
The passing of a single instant
is the passing of 4 years.
No passage of time will ever be enough to leave my brother behind.
Rest in peace, brother mine.